Sharing the Holidays is NOT Easy
This is the first time I have been in a relationship that required me to share the holidays. It is not that I mind visiting my Girlfriend’s family, I actually really enjoy it, and I think it is going to be great to experience Christmas somewhere else. However, it really upsets my family, and that is not an easy thing for me.
I made it home for Thanksgiving, it was great. My birthday always falls on or around Thanksgiving, and to be able to be with my family for my birthday is always a pleasure. My Girlfriend made the trip up from North Carolina to be with us, and it was amazing. She was a big hit, my family and our extended family (very close family friends) all enjoyed her company. But when I went home I had to break the news to my Father that I would be with her for Christmas. He was devastated.
I know he understood that this is part of growing up, and when you find yourself with someone, sacrifices need to be made, but it still hurt him. After thinking about it a little, I realized why…
Christmas is Dad’s holiday. My Mother is Jewish, and for a while we were raised Jewish. The one thing my Father always requested was that he got to have Christmas, and now, for the first time, one of his boys will not be there for his favorite time of the year.
I talked to him about it a bit, and he offered to put up her family, and have them come to Connecticut for a New England Christmas. I mentioned it to her, but understood she wanted to be with her family in their home.
So now I am trying to figure out a way to make it home for Christmas Eve to see my parents, but financially it does not seem feasible. I feel like this is a good learning experience for me, and something I will most likely have to deal with for the rest of my life…
Growing up seems to affect all aspects of your life, some easier then others, but I know it is part of life, and I can only be thankful that my parents are still around to go through this with me…
Tags: Growing up, Sharing Holidays
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December 1, 2008 at 5:11 pm
That is really tough. I’ve had to do that before, but always within the same metro area as my then-boyfriends. Even then, even when you’re at most 45 minutes away from each other’s parents’ houses, it’s tough to tell your folks you’re going to be MIA for Christmas Eve/morning, etc. I’m sure it will work out. It’s ok that traditions evolve.
December 1, 2008 at 5:28 pm
sharing holidays is so hard. i hate being away from my family and missing out on our traditions. i guess i’m glad to be single this holiday season
December 1, 2008 at 6:04 pm
Maybe one day you can have both families at your own house! Problem solved… Until you start dealing with divorced families
December 2, 2008 at 6:05 am
I spent Thanksgiving with my parents but won’t be able to visit them for Christmas (due to work, not a relationship), and I didn’t realize how hard it would be.
Enjoy your holiday season!!
December 2, 2008 at 8:54 pm
This is deep, and I agree we will all face it for the rest of our lives. I faced it with Thanksgiving, splitting time between my mothers side of the family and fathers side. I was able to see both sides, but it was so much traveling/organizing it honestly felt like the holiday was just another day of work.